worries.

Proverbs 22:4
The reward of humility and the fear of the LORD are riches, honor and life.

i am a worrier. i think it comes with my need to make plans. it's essentially a need to control things. i know, i know. this is no new revelation for you if you know me, or even for myself. just a statement of fact. but that simple statement of fact is not the point of this little blog entry.

in my spiritual life class this semester, my professor brought something interesting to my attention that i had never realized before. in 1 peter 5:5-7, it says this:

You younger men, likewise, be subject to your elders; and all of you, clothe yourselves with humility toward one another, for GOD IS OPPOSED TO THE PROUD, BUT GIVES GRACE TO THE HUMBLE. Therefore humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God, that He may exalt you at the proper time, casting all your anxiety on Him, because He cares for you. [emphasis through caps theirs.]

you can humble yourself by casting your anxiety, your worry, on Him. and you trust Him because He cares for you. humility here is contrasted with worry. when i worry, i don't take God at His word that He'll take care of me. In matthew, Jesus said that as he takes care of the birds and the lilies, how much more so will He take care of me? and something inside me causes me to doubt His ability to do so. so i worry.

this popped into my head when i was reading that proverb earlier today. i'm well aware that pride is one of my biggest flaws, and it's pretty much the worst one to have. but it even shows itself in my worry. it shows how little i trust Him to take care of me. i trust people to do that all the time. how can i not trust God?

Father, clear my heart and mind of my anxieties that I might see You and your love more clearly. Help me find my focus on your love rather than my own abilities. Create in me a heart that seeks You and your kingdom first and leaves the rest to you. You are my Provider, my loving Father, and my ever-present Help. Thank you for the life You have given me. AMEN.