the courage to unpack.

it's really strange to have a whole lifetime of memories packed up in my car.

let me explain. after all of the ugly divorce stuff, the house that i lived in for a majority of my life is no longer going to belong to my family. it has been a long process. but saturday we had to pack up everything. when i say everything, i mean everything. all of my room, all of my furniture, pictures, clothes, and such.

you just don't think that you'd be the one in possession of your baby book or school pictures or the cast from when you broke your wrist in third grade. those are the kinds of things your parents hang on to at their houses forever. the problem is that my parent doesn't have the room to store it all, so i had to take them. and i really don't mind. it's just very strange to have all of it.

i haven't even had the guts to carry it all up to my apartment yet. all of it still sits in my car, just whispering the memories to me. my old gymnastics medals and competition t-shirts, tons of pictures from high school and my first year in college, old cards and letters.

some of those memories i want to keep buried, and some i don't mind unpacking. but i just haven't decided which ones fall into which category. and what do i do with all of them?

just let the past, be the past. hopefully, it will shine a bright light to help me navigate my future. but in the present, they still sit there and whisper calmly to me. reminding me of where i come from, all i am, and all that i could be.