so, i was sitting at work doing my job... sort of... and it hit me. it was after i wrote my previous entry yesterday, and i was talking about my job and how i'm mostly satisfied and whatnot. and suddenly, something my old pastor said in a conversation once came back to me. we had been talking about worship, and how if you can worship even with music you don't like because of your sacrifice in worshipping despite the style your offer of worship is greater than it would be if you liked the style. and this thought struck me as i was surfing the internet for job opportunities that i may want in the future and such, and immediately i thought this. if i do my work that i don't always enjoy and do it to the best of my ability, isn't that glorifying to God even more so than if i was doing a job that i adored?
it's easy to do a good job at a job that you love and are good at, but when you're not the best at something or you just don't like doing something we don't always put in the effort to finish strongly. our lives and our work are all offers of worship to God and to do less than our best is kind of to tell Him that He is worthy of our best work through our hard times. And it just hit me hard. Yes, I could complain about how I don't like every single aspect of my job and how it's so hard to do a job that i just don't love, but that's not what counts. what counts is not the challenges i face, but how i handle those challenges. and i think i'm going to start handling them in a different way now because worship is more than something i do on sunday morning, it's how i live my life.
-lovingly-
k
Tuesday, March 24, 2009
Monday, March 23, 2009
here's to life!
i have so many things that i've thought about writing here for you, but i just haven't been able to sit down and write them. i have some kind of writers block, but really it's mostly laziness. once i actually sit down to write it's like a torrential downpour of words. maybe that's why i haven't. i'm afraid of what will come out. however, i have decided [once more] to carry my journal in my purse with me everywhere so that i have a place to jot down whatever comes to mind. anyhoo... if you're reading this, you probably don't care about my journaling habits. so here's what happening lately.
spring break was great. i wish i wasn't sick for the first couple of days, but overall it was very relaxing and lovely. i got about zero school work done. which just means i have a lot to work on this week, especially since my position paper for soteriology is due friday. yeah. call me procrastinator. i just feel no motivation to do those things. it's not like in college or high school where i didn't do them to the last minute because i could. i definitely should not put off these papers, and i start to feel a little bad that i don't put in my best effort, especially since it's seminary. i just keep trying to decide if staying in it right now is what i should do, or should i wait a little longer until i'm settled and such. part of me really wants a great writing job, and that's hard to do with a full or even a half-load there. so please pray for direction. i just don't know where i'm going with school right now, and it kinda drives me crazy.
however, wedding planning is finally coming together. we have the ceremony, reception, and rehearsal dinner locations. we finally have bridesmaid dresses chosen and tuxes picked out. daniel and i chose our wedding bands on saturday too. we've registered. we have a wedding website. my invitations are designed, i just have to change a couple of things and have them printed to send out in a couple of months. i have a dress that i absolutely love! and i have lots of decorating ideas that have to wait a little bit. the photographer is all set. it's finally starting to feel like less work, although i still stress. but that's just me. and basically, i'm so excited and can't wait to start our lives together. i can't believe it's just over 4 months away.
work is good. i go in and out of job satisfaction, but overall i really can't complain. i get to do good work for good people and get paid for it. and working at the church has really helped me narrow down my future goals. i've learned more of who i am and what i want to do. the gym is pretty good. all-stars is winding down which is nice. that means there are fewer attitudes to deal with. i really enjoy teaching my wednesday classes with the little ones, who sadly left me to play soccer for the next month or two, and the older beginner girls. i've really seen a change in attitude from a few of them, and while they're still quite crazy, it's really cool to see how far they've come in the month that i've been working with them. i also have another opportunity or two for jobs that are exciting, so i'm really praying about those now too. and at least once a week i check out job websites to see if there are any opportunities for me. my issue is the whole full-time student thing, and that they may interfere with some commitments i may be making soon. so if you can keep me in your prayers there too.
there is sooo much bouncing around in this head of mine that it's amazing that i get anything done ever really. and i tend to worry a lot, so that doesn't help either. but on the upside, i've had an amazing couple of weeks/weekends with my favorite people. so i have really gotten to see how blessed i am, and how important relationships are. and i get excited thinking about all the possibilities too. so here's to life! have a blessed day!
-lovingly-
k
p.s. i'll try to make my next post a little less self-involved. :)
spring break was great. i wish i wasn't sick for the first couple of days, but overall it was very relaxing and lovely. i got about zero school work done. which just means i have a lot to work on this week, especially since my position paper for soteriology is due friday. yeah. call me procrastinator. i just feel no motivation to do those things. it's not like in college or high school where i didn't do them to the last minute because i could. i definitely should not put off these papers, and i start to feel a little bad that i don't put in my best effort, especially since it's seminary. i just keep trying to decide if staying in it right now is what i should do, or should i wait a little longer until i'm settled and such. part of me really wants a great writing job, and that's hard to do with a full or even a half-load there. so please pray for direction. i just don't know where i'm going with school right now, and it kinda drives me crazy.
however, wedding planning is finally coming together. we have the ceremony, reception, and rehearsal dinner locations. we finally have bridesmaid dresses chosen and tuxes picked out. daniel and i chose our wedding bands on saturday too. we've registered. we have a wedding website. my invitations are designed, i just have to change a couple of things and have them printed to send out in a couple of months. i have a dress that i absolutely love! and i have lots of decorating ideas that have to wait a little bit. the photographer is all set. it's finally starting to feel like less work, although i still stress. but that's just me. and basically, i'm so excited and can't wait to start our lives together. i can't believe it's just over 4 months away.
work is good. i go in and out of job satisfaction, but overall i really can't complain. i get to do good work for good people and get paid for it. and working at the church has really helped me narrow down my future goals. i've learned more of who i am and what i want to do. the gym is pretty good. all-stars is winding down which is nice. that means there are fewer attitudes to deal with. i really enjoy teaching my wednesday classes with the little ones, who sadly left me to play soccer for the next month or two, and the older beginner girls. i've really seen a change in attitude from a few of them, and while they're still quite crazy, it's really cool to see how far they've come in the month that i've been working with them. i also have another opportunity or two for jobs that are exciting, so i'm really praying about those now too. and at least once a week i check out job websites to see if there are any opportunities for me. my issue is the whole full-time student thing, and that they may interfere with some commitments i may be making soon. so if you can keep me in your prayers there too.
there is sooo much bouncing around in this head of mine that it's amazing that i get anything done ever really. and i tend to worry a lot, so that doesn't help either. but on the upside, i've had an amazing couple of weeks/weekends with my favorite people. so i have really gotten to see how blessed i am, and how important relationships are. and i get excited thinking about all the possibilities too. so here's to life! have a blessed day!
-lovingly-
k
p.s. i'll try to make my next post a little less self-involved. :)
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